I was driving on Route 87 yesterday returning from visiting a dear friend in the hospital and while driving I got onto a rhythm with a fellow driver on the road. It was a large truck, white cab with a red bed and we just seemed simpatico in our driving. We kept pace, him following me through many lane changes, around slow cars, traffic impediments keeping up with each-other for 20 miles or so, even through a toll. As I exited, I thought to look back and just as I was raising my hand to wave goodbye, he was already doing so. That left me smiling for quite a few more miles. That driver and I, we clicked.
By the way, the people I was visiting in a hospital I met in a playground 15 years ago as the mom was pushing her daughter on a swing in Queens next to my daughter in the other swing. Both girls are the same age and ended up growing up together as the two moms (both of us single parents) forged a friendship and became each others support system for a decade. That day on the swings was different. I had been to that park dozens of times that year alone, but somehow on that day, it just clicked.
Yesterday a dear friend from college sent me a thank you note. We used to see a band live regularly off campus called The Authority. I actually found one of their CD’s on Amazon, I burned it onto a disk and sent her a few other things including a handwritten note sprayed with the perfume she used to wear in college called LuLu. I remember the day meeting her like yesterday. It was my first day on campus in our new dorm the International Living Center at Syracuse and I saw her across a room. I immediately over and said “Hi, I am Jeanne.” That struck up a friendship that has endured 25 years. I had never done that before as I was a very shy 19 year old, but I had to meet her. I knew when we shook each others hand we would be lifelong friends. It just clicked.
Also yesterday I bumped into a lady I met in a parenting class earlier this year. She coincidentally is the mom of a boy in my son’s specialized school and even in his classroom! I invited her to my home last April with her newborn and her son for a play-date. She stated yesterday that that day was so special to her because I was so nurturing to her. I just figured that a mom who just had her third child needed a few hours of someone not allowing her to serve others. She texted me later that bumping into me was the highlight of her day, and we of course planned another play-date. We just click.
All these people came from different places, religions and races by chance. They span 20 years in ages. What they have in common is that instantly I knew there was a connection. I am aware that I may never see that truck driver again, but I hope that the good energy from that brief contact made his drive easier. The others, I am sure I will know for many more years, even decades to come.
At my father’s funeral 17 years ago, I was just 27 and pregnant with my first born, Kayla. My dad was a shy man who worked at a company from age 20 to his death at 48. At funeral I was shocked. Not just because of his death but because 200+ people chose to attend his wake, perhaps even 300. So many strangers walked up to me telling me about Bob (my father’s name was Robert) and telling me a story about this person I did not know who happened to be my dad. They were all tales of how he had helped them, or made them laugh or just connected over coffee or a cigarette break at work. It taught me that we all have lives outside of our home and that you can bond with someone, not just family. At age 27 I had already had that experience many times over but it reinforced that internal belief system and strengthened it for me. My father was not a wealthy man or even gregarious. He was quiet, even solitary and often gruff for most of the life that I knew him, and yet hundreds of people needed to come see him off at the wake, connect with me to tell me about how important he was to them. Hundreds of acquaintances, friends and colleagues felt compelled to say something to me to comfort me, a complete stranger. They all somehow clicked with him.
I recently read a post on Facebook featuring centurions who have somehow maintained their health and vigor. They were all asked what was their secret, quite a few stated, although I paraphrase, that their secret was keeping all types of folks around them all the time and maintaining those freindships. Different sexes, religions, nationalities, races. They said it kept them vibrant and engaged and learning.
These connections are vital to our health, the community we live in and as the world becomes flatter for all nations, the world. They ease tensions, slowly erase cultural prejudices and allow love to spread. Keep your connections. You will live longer fuller lives and will improve the positive energy wherever you go. Go Click. Meet people. If the energy seems right, say hello. Keep in contact. Share experiences. Build a life of these. It is both selfish and generous to do , thus everyone wins.
I hope, after reading this, perhaps you will reach out to me and we can click.
Make today remarkable.